This Box Contains
by McManly
Summary: This is after Owen's first therapy session with Dr. Wyatt and I hope is foreshadowing Cristina's future role in his treatment.


Why didn't I just go home?, thought Owen, going over various other scenarios in his mind that would have not ended in him choking Cristina. Now that he's lost her, he wonders how he is going to focus on work today with her on his service. He thought about taking her off his service, or calling in sick, but that wouldn't fix anything. He knows at some point that he has to deal with her, its just a matter of him being able to hold it together when he sees her the first time.

It has only been a few weeks since that night in the on-call room. Owen thought about how they loved each other that night, what did it all mean now that its over? Do the feelings just go away? Of course in his mind he knows that it isn't over with Cristina., but it was something that was inevitable for now.

Owen, sunglasses still on, gets out of his truck and walks to the front of SGH. Meredith, Cristina and Karev are ahead of him, and he keeps his distance and pretends not to notice as Cristina turns around and looks at him. She smiles delicately at him like the day he sat on her steps and told her he thought she was beautiful.

"How can she still smile at ME?" Owen wondered as he realized then he was frozen staring back at Cristina, expressionless, before she turned around and went inside. He still didn't know how he looses track of time like that. Something must just happen? Whatever it is, he wasn't sure what he should be feeling, or not feeling, in these moments with Cristina. Where they are 'over' but are they?

Before he starts his shift Owen has an appointment with Dr. Wyatt. After Cristina ended things, Owen is desperate to make himself whole again. Last week Owen and Dr. Wyatt barely broke the ice in therapy. She might as well have been asking him what his favorite color was. He promised himself today he's going to try and make more of an effort instead of freezing up.

He makes his way out of the change room, and runs almost smack dab into Cristina, coffee in her hands ready to get going. "Hey", she looks up at him intently. Still he can't look her in the eyes, and instead pretends to be reading the operating board, "I...have a meeting," his voice cracked nervously before he walked away from her, still not looking her in the eyes. He knew she was staring at him as he walked down the hall, as her eyes were burning through his skull.

He knew that was not the best way to greet her, but for now it was the only way he could cope. He wondered if she realized the effect she had on him, or even knew that she was part of the reason. Dr. Wyatt's office was wide open when he arrived. It smelled of pine and tobacco, even though there was no smoking in the hospital. A massive fish tank was up against the main wall, some say that the fish help with relaxation, he of course did not notice a difference, but he thought the sharks were kind of cool.

There is a receptionist, probably about 25, she gives him the fresh meat eye when he arrives. Nothing about her is appealing to Owen, but at this point he doesn't really care to interact with her, he is so annoyed at himself for how he treated Cristina.

"Hi there Dr. Hunt. Dr. Wyatt is ready for you," she smiles at him.

"Thanks miss, "Without looking at her he takes a breath and walks into Dr. Wyatt's office. She's sitting behind the desk sipping on some coffee.

"Good morning Owen, how are you?", she asked him as if she didn't know. But she sort of doesn't know, at least not the full story.

"Hello ma'am," Owen stands waits for some kind of signal, or something to tell him to do something other than stand there like an idiot.

"Please, have a seat, so what's on your mind?", she looks at him intently, and concerned.

"Uh.. I'm not sure. Feeling kind of crappy actually," Owen shrugged.

"How so?" she probed him, of course, he doesn't help her out too much.

"I'm having trouble. I'm finding it hard working with my ex, harder than I thought it would. We need it this way so I can focus on myself. But its getting too hard," Owen looked down at his navy blue shoes, the ones he wore everyday. The ones Cristina makes him take off when he gets to her place and put them on the mat.

"She means a lot to you then?" Dr. Wyatt asked as he finally looked up from his shoes.

"Well for a while she was the only one who really got me. But I became too much of a burden, it was time." Owen's voice cracks when he mentions IT like it was a death of some kind.

"How did you two get together?" Dr. Wyatt, now taking notes, captured Owen's gaze before he tried to drift off.

"It's a long story, essentially I fell in love with her at first sight. Our eyes met and that was that. I kissed her the first day I met her. Then she kind of rejected me and I went back… " Owen stopped unable to still say it.

"Iraq? For how long?"

"A few months. Then something happened, the attack…. I ended up discharged. And decided to take the chief up on his offer.," Owen hoped she wouldn't have caught the 'attack' bit but knew that she had. Oh boy this is going to be fun, he thought.

"Have you talked to anyone else about the attack?"

"Nobody but Cristina. I don't know why I even told her," he shrugged.

"What do you mean? Wasn't she your girlfriend?

"Not at the time. We hadn't started dating for a few months after I came back."

"Why tell her?"

"I don't… know. I guess because we had a connection once. I'm not sure."

"Are you still involved?"

"It just ended a few weeks ago. I ended up harming her when I was asleep. It became complicated."

"I see. I think we can get down to the bottom of it, if you are willing. We can both help get you back on track," She looks at him, unconditionally, not in a motherly way or anything, but just a look of complete acceptance and understanding, a look that he missed seeing in Cristina's eyes.

"I'm going to do my best ma'am. I am not the most talkative guy, at least not anymore," he looks at the fish tank in her office, wondering if that relaxation crap really works before he gets nervous.

"Well I have a couple approaches I'd like to run by you, but I first want to advise you that you might want to recruit your support system during this time. It will be intense emotionally for you to delve into your past and quite draining frankly. You are going to need an emotional outlet. Do you have that Owen?" She asked, again non-judgmentally.

"Uh.. I have to think about it. I have a few friends here but no one I'd consider a support system. Cristina was the only rock I had and now she's not," He trails off mid-sentence..

"Well it seems like you ended on good terms, I am sure if you ask her to be in your life in a different capacity, as a friend she would. I know that sounds cliché, considering the whole 'let's be friends' argument, but you will truly need her, or someone at this time when we get started. I hope you consider it. Is there anything else you would like to talk about?", Dr. Wyatt asked him, not in a condescending way but in the way that she could tell he was deep in thought.

"I'll run it by her. I was kind of a jerk to her this morning so I'm not sure how receptive she'll be. Are we done here?" Owen stands up looking at his watch pretending he has to be somewhere.

"Ok time's up then. Think about what I said though, about the rock," She starts putting her notebook and other files away that were on her desk and walks out from behind it to see him out.

"I will. Its not on the top of my list right now, but I'll consider it, thanks Dr. Wyatt," Owen looks at her quickly before leaving the office, completely ignoring the receptionist who craned her neck as if she was going to say something.

Owen quickly walks out of the psych office, hoping no one else on staff catches him leaving. Little did he know that Cristina was just coming around the corner stopped in her tracks, so he wouldn't see her watching him leave. She stood there about a minute of what all this could mean. Then she turned around, on the look out for Owen, thinking he's probably in a crappy mood after therapy.

Owen is looking all over for Cristina before going back to the trauma unit. He thought to himself if I were Cristina where would I be right now? Then he made his way over to the coffee cart on the second floor, the floor with the great view. It was her morning spot before getting hardcore the rest of the day. He see her right away last in line behind about 6 people.

Owen has mastered the art of sneaking up on Cristina at any given moment. Although now he's not so sure if its still kosher. What the hell, he thought to himself. He sneaks up behind her, nudges his finger on her shoulder. Still with her back turned, she asks him, "So you're talking to me now?"

Surprised, but not Owen says, "What do you mean? I just had to wake up first.", what an excuse he thought maybe it worked.

"Whatever. What is it?", she turns around facing him, right in the eyes. He couldn't tell if she was really pissed or just concerned. Either way he couldn't let her get away from him now.

"I was wondering… if we could have coffee after work. Just to talk," Owen looked down the way he does when he is embarrassed and lost. She understands it still looks him in the eyes.

"Yeah. Just send me a text when you're off trauma," Cristina quickly turns around again, pretending to be seriously into coffee moving up in line, but really just letting him walk away without having to say anything else because she knows how hard it is for him.

"Ok then. By the way, I just wanted to say that I miss you," Owen still standing behind her, wishing he could see her reaction before he walked away, all he hears is the coffee cart guy saying, "Dr. Yang, what can I get you, Dr. Yang? Hello?" Cristina's voice is nowhere to be heard.


End file.
